Friday, 2 January 2009

This addendum is so ON

As previously mentioned, in big budget American movies, there’s always a quick cut to someone saying something stupid soundbitey and brazen, or comedic. Like in Mr and Mrs Smith, the aside was used to clue the audience in on particularly unspectacular pieces of exposition. Well, here’s an addendum.

It is so on.

Bring it.

It is so brought.

I brought it.

It was on.

It still is on.

What do these mean? What is on? What are we meant to be bringing? Who is bringing them? Do they have the proper risk assessment paperwork to bring something that is so on? In my world, being ‘on’ means having your period. Bring it means ‘fetch that thing from the pantry and butter it for me’. So Americans, I put this to you… stop saying stupid pointless things in films. They mean nothing, add nothing and do not sound cool, tough, edgy or sassy. They sound laden with cheerleading stupidity and utter deference to the gloriousness of the sarcastic put-down. C minus.

No comments: